Wednesday, 16 March 2011

Coventry City F.C. - Application

Dear Mr Ranson,

I'd like to offer my application for the currently vacant managerial position at Coventry City F.C.

Below is my C.V. for your consideration.



Experience
Currently have no actual managerial experience outside of the realm of Championship Manager 01-02. But am confident that the skills I have acquired from this computer game will translate into the real world.

As a demonstration of my skills I have played the entire 2010-11 season with Coventry City F.C. and following is the detail of how I got on:



OK, let’s get one thing out of the way – I wouldn’t mind being sent to Coventry.
I think we can move on now.
It’s nice to have a go at a Championship club, one step away from the top flight & I’ll do my best to get us there.

Board Expectations:



Low expectations there; pretty realistic considering the club’s league position. Although staying clear of the relegation zone wasn’t good enough for Aidy Boothroyd. I’ll try for top half, and maybe better depending on how much cash I’ll have to spend.



The Season:

July:
First thing to do is to sort out my backroom staff. Assistant Martin Pert was replaced by Andy Porter from York. And coaches Steve Harrison & Gregor Rioch were also replaced, this time by John Gymer, Dave Barnett & Bury’s Neil Cutler. Then Fulham offered Andy O’Boyle a contract that I couldn’t match so he left & he was replaced by Dean Richards. I was in two minds whether to sign Dean or not, but I thought it could be my tiny little tribute to the man.
Next the playing staff, was short a few players but had about £1.7 million to spend, I checked out the reserves first, and youngsters Jordan Clarke, Gary Deegan, Danny Ward and Sean Jeffers were promoted to the first team. Conversely Callum Wilson & Michael Quirke were transfer listed & sold to Norwich and Walsall respectively.
I was short a right back, a right winger & a striker. I got Mike Grella in on season-long loan from Leeds, I’ve had him on loan before at other clubs and he was a goal machine. I then signed Wade Elliott from Burnley for £675K and my fellow Welshman Danny Gabbidon from West Ham £875K.

August:
My squad was complete, but not for long. Stoke bid for Danny Ireland, and he’s a bit rubbish so I let him go and signed Arran Lee-Barrett from Ipswich as a replacement.
League-wise we started OK. A win, a loss and 2 draws left us 12th. We also won our League Cup 1st round game on penalties after drawing to Chesterfield – didn’t realise their ground was called the B2Net stadium, I mean, come on!

September:
Had a better September with three home wins, which brought us up to 8th. However we somehow managed to lose in the League Cup 2nd round at home to Shrewsbury. We should have smashed them, but somehow could not tame the Shrews. Sorry, that’s a really rubbish line.

October:
Aron Einar Gunnarsson was attracting some interest from other clubs which I was rejecting as he was one of our best players. However he threw a bit of a strop and revealed he wanted to leave so I transfer listed him. Michael Doyle also got a bit stroppy so he was sold to Blackpool for £875K. In the league we didn’t have a great month, falling to 13th.

November:
We had an awesome month, winning 5 out of 5 and rising to 5th. I also signed Lewin Nyatanga as we were a little short at left back. Sean Jeffers didn’t quite make it in the first team so he was loaned out to Stafford until the end of the season.

December:
Our good form continued as we stayed 5th after briefly occupying 2nd spot. We finally sold Gunnarsson to Wolves for £1.2M. Also Stafford took another one of our players on loan, this time Gary Deegan.

January:
Another great month, moved up a place to 4th. Also won our FA Cup 3rd round tie, a great home win against West Ham. We then drew Arsenal away, and managed to scrape a 1-1 draw to force a replay at the Ricoh. Young defender Jordan Clarke went out on loan to Rushden & Diamonds. Also, Danny Ward’s loan ended & he went back to Bolton, I didn’t really need a replacement for him. Finally, young defender Nathan Cameron didn’t make the grade so was allowed to leave to Oldham for a nominal fee.



February:
Unfortunately we lost the Arsenal replay in extra time after (rather luckily to be fair) drawing 1-1 after 90 minutes. Loan striker Mike Grella was subject to a bid by Birmingham which his parent club accepted. We couldn’t compete with his offer so he left Coventry – it wasn’t much of a loss as he had not been the goal machine I had hoped for (unless you count 4 goals as machine-like). As a replacement I only had to use a fraction of the Gunnarsson money to buy experienced striker David Healey for £275K. We finished the month 6th in the league

March:
March started OK, and here’s the league table as at the 16th of March – 2 days after Aidy Boothroyd was sacked:



I think the board would be pretty happy with that, in the mix for the playoffs with 9 games left.
An injury to Kieran Westwood meant I was short on stoppers, so I got Kasper Schmeichel in on loan to add his Danish/Lancashire voice to the dressing room.
There was one more game in the league in March after the above screenshot was taken, we won it to lie 5th with 8 games left, 3 points clear of 7th.

April:
We needed a very good April to cement our place in the playoffs, and we did. 4 wins and 2 draws saw us finish the month 3rd and a guaranteed playoff spot with a game remaining. Indeed we were only 2 points off 2nd spot so if we won our final game and Leicester didn’t (our goals aggregate was well ahead of theirs) then we would gain automatic promotion!

May:
On the last day, we had Sheffield United away who had nothing to play for. Leicester had Derby at home who were also mid-table. Just before the game Kieran Westwood got injured again & there was no time to get a replacement, this was a real blow as he was arguably our player of the season.
At half time we were locked at 0-0 whereas Leicester were 1-0 down, so all it potentially needed was for us to nick a goal. Fulltime at the Walkers stadium it was 1-0, unfortunately we conceded in the 78th minute without reply so missed out on 2nd by 2 points, disappointing, but I bet the fans would have taken the playoffs at the start of the season.


The 2010/11 Championship final league table:



As you can see, we would play Bristol City. We lost the first leg 1-0 away, we played pretty poorly to be fair. Then in the second leg we were leading 1-0 at halftime, but with extra time looming, conceded in the 85th minute to end our march to the Premier League. For the second application in a row I chose not to quit the game and try again, and instead let the result stand. It’s my experience that the team in 3rd never gain promotion anyway. In the end it was QPR who won the final.



Transfers:

 




Roll of honour:

Club Most Appearances:
Lukas Jutkiewicz           51 (out of 53)

Club Most Man of the Match:
Lukas Jutkiewicz           5

Club Most Assists:
Carl Baker                     11

Club Top Goalscorer:
Lukas Jutkiewicz           21

Championship team of the year
Kieran Westwood

Fans player of the year:
Lukas Jutkiewicz

Championship Player of the Month:
Lukas Jutkiewicz           September

Attendances:
Lowest:            11,078  vs. Shrewsbury              League Cup 2nd round
Highest:           32,600  vs. Leicester                  Championship (9 off capacity!)
Average:          21,228              (65% capacity)



Finances




Future
I’m not going to bother with another season, but here’s what I’d do:
·         Sign a right winger. There are also quite a few youngsters who went out on loan last season in the first team. If they don’t make the grade then they’ll need replacing. I should have about £10 million to spend. Loadsamoney.
·         Gain promotion this time.
·         Improve the backroom staff if stand-out coaching talent becomes available and I can be bothered.

Summary
Made the playoffs after the board only expected survival. Should really have gained promotion but continued my erectile dysfunction and couldn’t get past a semi.

As you can see, I would be a great addition to Coventry as my vast experience on Championship Manager has helped me learn a lot about man management, tactics & how to work with a limited budget. All of these could be translated into a real-world environment. I also am used to management-speak so could bring some blue sky thinking to the sky blues.

I think I’d also fit into the surrounding area, according to Wikipedia there are many famous Coventrians I admire: pornstar/darts player Steve Beaton and Richard “smash it” Keys to name but two.

I assure you that my knowledge is invaluable and you will not find a better (virtual) manager anywhere else.

Sunday, 13 March 2011

Bristol Rovers F.C. - Application

Dear Mr Higgs,

I'd like to offer my application for the currently vacant managerial position at Bristol Rovers F.C.

Below is my C.V. for your consideration.



Experience
Currently have no actual managerial experience outside of the realm of Championship Manager 01-02. But am confident that the skills I have acquired from this computer game will translate into the real world.

As a demonstration of my skills I have played the entire 2010-11 season with Bristol Rovers F.C. and following is the detail of how I got on:



First off, as a Welshman there is a bit of a rivalry between Rovers and the Welsh clubs, I also know a couple of mates who are City fans. I won’t let either of these factors affect my management of Rovers; I’m way too professional for that.
Anyway, let’s see what the board expects.

Board Expectations:






















Pretty low expectations there; basically stay out of the relegation zone. My task will also be made harder than in real life because there will be no clubs doing us a favour by having 10 point deductions.



The Season:

July:
First thing to do is to sort out my backroom staff. Moses Underwood left and I brought in Andy May, Jason Dozzell & Martin Filson as new coaches. Darren Patterson was brought in as a new assistant manager; Warren Neil was reassigned as a coach to make room.
After looking at the first team squad, I was short a centre back, a left back, a left winger and 2 strikers – with £600K to spend.
I mistakenly bought Jason Euell from Blackpool for £300K after thinking he was an out and out striker, in reality he’s an attacking midfielder, probably should have checked that, oh well he’ll add some class to the squad. Anyway I got Plymouth’s Rory Patterson & Forest’s Dele Adebola in as proper strikers for a combined £115K.
Central defender Gavin Dayes and versatile winger Ashley Vincent were brought in from Dagenham and Colchester respectively for a total of £136K.
I was still short a left back but money had ran out, I could live with this as maybe money would become available later on.

August:
First game of the season was a thrilling 4-2 defeat to Hartlepool. Unbelievable Jeff.
Then it was league cup first round time. We smashed championship Leicester 5-2 at home!
After the opening day loss, we won every other game in the month, moving us up to 3rd.

September:
Not bad league form again, then came the league cup second round game against Premier League Wolves at home. We outclassed them 1-0 in front of a bumper crowd at the Memorial Stadium. The gate receipts from that game gave some money I could spend on a left back. So managed to get Stefan Stam from Yeovil for only £55K. My squad was complete already. That is quite a rare feat at this level I can assure you.
We finished the month 8th in the league.

October:
Decent month in the league again, finished the month still 8th.
The league cup dream died with a 2-0 away loss to West Ham, we were outclassed.
The cup run meant I had £200K to spend on transfers, however there were no players I wanted at this point in time.

November:
A great month in which we went unbeaten, rising to 3rd in the league. We also beat non-league Hyde 4-3 away in the FA Cup 1st round and drew our 2nd round tie away to Carlisle.

December:
Another unbeaten month, although this time mainly draws, we had a streak of 6 straight draws which included our FA Cup replay, which we disappointingly lost on penalties.
We finished the month 5th. We also won our Johnstone’s Paint Trophy first round game 1-0 against Barnet.

January:
Not a great month, we won our second round Johnstone’s Paint Trophy match against MK Dons 3-0 at home. We however lost the next round on penalties to Southend.
Our league form wasn’t great we fell to 8th by the end of the month.
On-loan goalkeeper Mikkel Andersen’s contract ended at the start of the month, so Leyton Orient’s Lee Butcher was signed as a replacement for £50K.


February:
We continued our league form and consolidated our 8th place – I’m really confident we can make the playoffs at the end of the season though.

March:
League Table as at 8th of March – the day after Dave Penney was sacked in the real world,























As you can see I’m performing much better than Dave, I’d be amazed if I would’ve been sacked based on the club’s league position.
A good run followed the above screenshot and we rose to 4th.

April:
We’re in the playoffs, but need a good month to stay there by the end of the season, and we did. Finishing April in 4th, with a playoff place assured, 3 points off the top 2 places with one game remaining

May:
We had a chance to win an automatic spot if we won our last game and Southampton or Huddersfield lost and Plymouth didn’t win. At halftime we were 2-0 up and the top two were drawing, so still a chance.
In the end we won our game but other results didn’t go our way so we finished 3rd.


The 2010/11 League 1 final league table:























So we got Charlton in the playoff semi. To be honest it would be a travesty if we didn’t qualify, we were easily the best team in the playoffs. We drew at home 1-1, which was a bit disappointing, but we didn’t really deserve to win. Then in the return leg we dominated, but somehow only managed another 1-1 draw after 90 minutes. Then we conceded in the 7th minute of extra time and never got a goal back – completely gutted. Often at this stage I would close the game down and try again, but let it show as a mark of my professionalism that I did not.



Transfers:






Roll of honour:

Club Most Appearances:
Rory Patterson              57 (out of 57!)

Club Most Man of the Match:
Rory Patterson              7

Club Most Assists:
Jason Euell                   14

Club Top Goalscorer:
Rory Patterson              29

League 1 Team of the year
Luke Daniels
Jeff Hughes
Gavin Dayes
Jason Euell

Fans player of the year:
Rory Patterson

League 1 Manager of the Month:
James Rees                  November

Attendances:
Lowest:              2,894  vs. Barnet          Johnstone’s Paint Trophy South 1st round
Highest:           11,896  vs. Charlton       League 1 playoff semi-final (20 off capacity!)
Average:            8,647              (73% capacity)



Finances




Future
I’m not going to bother with another season, but here’s what I’d do:
·         Sign a goalkeeper and a left back. I should have just over £2 million to spend so may buy for other positions as well.
·         Gain promotion this time.
·         Improve the backroom staff if stand-out coaching talent becomes available and I can be bothered.

Summary
Made the playoffs after the board only expected survival. Should really have gained promotion but suffered from erectile dysfunction and couldn’t get past a semi.

As you can see, I would be a great addition to Rovers as my vast experience on Championship Manager has helped me learn a lot about man management, tactics & how to work with a limited budget. All of these could be translated into a real-world environment.

I think I’d also fit into the surrounding area, it’s not too bad a commute from Cardiff. Also, according to Wikipedia there are many famous Gasheads I admire: Ian Holloway, Roni Size & Rod Hull to name but a few.

I assure you that my knowledge is invaluable and you will not find a better (virtual) manager anywhere else.

Wednesday, 9 March 2011

Bradford City A.F.C. - Application


Dear Mr Lawn & Mr Rhodes,

I'd like to offer my application for the currently vacant managerial position at Bradford City A.F.C.

Below is my C.V. for your consideration.


Experience
Currently have no actual managerial experience outside of the realm of Championship Manager 01-02. But am confident that the skills I have acquired from this computer game will translate into the real world.
As a demonstration of my skills I have played the entire 2010-11 season with Bradford City A.F.C. and following is the detail of how I got on:

First off, it’s been a while since my last application. I recently had a rejection letter from West Brom which knocked me for six & I had lost faith in the English football management system to be honest.
Also, I like the approach in sacking (come on – you’re fooling nobody with the “left by mutual consent” line) a manager in advance. It gave me a few days to prepare an application. As it happens I was busy anyway that week, which is why I only sit down to write this as the missus is watching “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” (have you seen it? Appalling).
Anyway, on with the season, let’s see what the board expect:

Board Expectations:





















Respectable league position? I always think that’s pretty ambiguous don’t you? Basically I’ll try and do a better job than peter Taylor. Playoffs do you? OK.



The Season:

July:

First thing was to sort out my backroom staff. Wayne Jacobs, Ian Ormondroyd & Junior Lewis all left the club by mutual consent (sacked) and were replaced by Keith Waldon, Dennis Booth & Tony Barratt. I also brought in Liam O’Kane as there was a slot previously unfilled. All these coaches were unemployed when I found them so no compensation was paid. I replaced the previous coaches because the new guys had higher stats.
Now the playing staff, short on a number of areas, but most notably wingers. Tried getting Robert Pires in on trial, but he wasn’t interested. I had £55K to spend & managed to get veteran Nicky Barmby in for that exact figure. A bargain, if he stays fit I reckon he’ll get loads of assists.
We played a few friendlies, but nothing of note really.

August:

I was still short a left back, a right back, a left winger, a right winger & a striker – but there was no money in the bank, so I looked in the reserves to see who I could sell.
Steve Williams and Leon Osborne made the cut and were promoted to the first team.
However Jake Speight, Lewis Horne, Lloyd Saxton & Luke Dean were all transfer listed. The first three were sold straight away to Carlisle, Carlisle (again) and Peterborough respectively for £95K combined, this was not as much as I’d hoped.

First game of the season was home to Torquay, Nick Barmby made his debut and I appointed him club captain straight off. The game was a thriller, but we lost 3-2. The board were not happy.
We won the next league game and outclassed League 1 Bournemouth in the league cup first round, which soon cheered them up.
The draw for the league cup 2nd round was made and we got Bolton away, which should definitely raise some money.

September:

September started with a 4-0 smashing of Stockport, which made the fans happy.
I was still short on funds; Luke Dean was finally bought, but only for 3K by Bristol Rovers.
Midfielders David Syers & Mike Flynn were transfer listed and sold for £120K to Yeovil and Blackpool. A bit concerned that a Premier League team bought Mike, maybe I should’ve kept hold of him.

Then came the game against Bolton. After a 0-0 fulltime result there was a nervy period of extra time which was also goalless. In the end we triumphed 5-4 on penalties with Jon McLaughlan the hero, saving 3 penalties (and even scoring one himself!)

October:

So now I had £120K to spend, which used on Gillingham’s left winger Chris Palmer & Plymouth’s defensive midfielder Damien Johnson. Still a few players short, but I doubt there’ll be any further funds so I’ll have to make do with the squad as is.
How’s the league going you ask? Not bad, top half, but outside the playoffs.
Time for the league cup 3rd round. Unfortunately we lost 1-0 away to Crystal Palace. We’ll be looking to the FA cup for another run.

November:

The cup run begins with a spotless 4-0 away win to Stains.
Peter Taylor was appointed as Oldham manager (who were bottom of League 2 at the time – I’ll let you know if he keeps them up).
The cup run continued with a posh 1-0 win over Peterborough at home. Let’s hope for a glamour tie away……….Wigan at home. The chairman will be hoping for a draw.

December:

Luke O’Brien started moaning about not being first choice, but he is simply not good enough. I would have sold him but he’s my only backup for Robbie Threlfall at left back.
The Johnstone’s Paint Trophy began and we beat Hartlepool at home 7-6 on pens after a 2-2 draw after extra time – unbelievable Jeff.
At the end of the month the loan deals of Louis Moult and Tom Adeyemi ended, so I’d be looking for loan replacements in January (in champ 01-02 you can only have a maximum of 2 players on loan at any time).

January:

I got in youngsters Julio Santa Cruz from Blackburn and James Hurst from West Brom. A striker and a right back respectively. Probably my last action in the transfer market this season.
Unfortunately the FA cup run ended at home to Wigan, a 1-0 loss, but we quitted ourselves admirably against the top-flight side.
But the Johnstone’s Paint Trophy dream lived on with another win on penalties, this time away at the seaside in Morcambe.
Then Zesh Rehman requested to be put on the transfer list. I rarely turn down a player’s request, so I agreed.

February:

The road to Wembley continued with a thrilling 5-2 home win against Oldham. Santa Cruz scored his 5th in 2 games after taking a while to settle in.
And further still…..A 3-0 home win over Notts County saw us reach the North section Final. Our opponents? Bury.
Santa Cruz was really firing now; another hattrick was part of a 5-0 demolition of Port Vale.


March:

Time for the Johnstone’s Paint Trophy northern final. A two-legged affair against Bury. Both games ended 2-2 – and unfortunately we lost on penalties. Really disappointing as we should have battered them at home.
Usually I do a screenshot of the league table on the day that the real-life manager was sacked, this time I forgot to do it, so here it is a couple of games later:





















Not bad eh? Right in the mix for promotion, better than Peter Taylor.
Oh yea, I terminated the loan deal of James Hurst as I needed cover on the right wing. Unfortunately all my bids have been rejected so far.
After the above picture was taken we went on a bit of a bad run, only taking one more point from twelve for the rest of March.

April:

OK we’re on the cusp of the playoffs, automatic promotion is probably beyond us, so we needed a decent April to get in the top 7. 3 wins, 2 draws and only one loss made us 7th, 2 points clear of Port Vale in 8th with one game left.

May:

Due to our superior goal difference, a draw would be good enough to make the playoffs. We were home to Burton Albion, but were dealt a blow before the game as top scorer Julio Santa Cruz’s loan had just run out. 20 goals in 25 games – we’ll miss that.
At half time we were 1-1. Port Vale were winning 2-0, so we were in the playoffs at that point, just.
Second half we conceded a goal and could not get one back so lost. Luckily Port Vale shipped 2 goals in the last 45 minutes, so we ended up in the playoffs anyway!

The 2010/11 League 2 Final Table:






















We had Chesterfield. First leg at home won 2-1 after leading 2-0, not bad
Second leg, were 1-0 down at half time, but a late Hanson goal saw us win 3-2 on aggregate
In the final (incidentally played at the Millennium Stadium??!!) we had Aldershot, and a Gareth Evans hattrick meant we won promotion in front of 20,000+ travelling Bradford fans!




Transfers:























Roll of honour:

Club Most Appearances:
Gareth Evans                 53 (out of 58)

Club Most Man of the Match:
Gareth Evans                 6
Steve Williams               6

Club Most Assists:
Chris Palmer                 21

Club Top Goalscorer:
Julio Santa Cruz            20

League 2 Young Player of the Month:
Chris Elliott                   April
Chris Elliott                   May

League 2 Player of the Month:
James Hanson               May

Fans player of the year:
Gareth Evans

International Callups:
Omar Daley                   Jamaica

League 2 Manager of the Month:
James Rees                  November
James Rees                  May

Attendances:
Lowest:              4,004  vs. Hartlepool                 Johnstone’s Paint Trophy North 1st round
Highest:           22,256  vs. Peterborough            FA Cup 2nd round
Average:            8,841              (35% capacity)



Finances


 


















Future
I’m not going to bother with another season, but here’s what I’d do:
·         Sign a right back, 2 left backs, a defensive midfielder, a left winger, 2 right wingers & 2 strikers. 9 players in total, I should have just over £1 million to spend though.
·         Obviously just aim to survive in League 1.
·         Improve the backroom staff if stand-out coaching talent becomes available and I can be bothered.

Summary
A great season, somehow managed to scrape promotion
Johnstone’s Paint Trophy Northern finalists
A financial profit made.

As you can see, I would be a great addition to Bradford as my vast experience on Championship Manager has helped me learn a lot about man management, tactics & how to work with a limited budget. All of these could be translated into a real-world environment.

I think I’d also fit into the surrounding area & according to Wikipedia, there are many famous Bradfordians I admire: Adrian Edmondson, Richard Whitely, Kimberley Walsh and Gareth Gates to name but a few.

I assure you that my knowledge is invaluable and you will not find a better (virtual) manager anywhere else.